Parenting Teenagers When They Become Sexually Active

Featuring Lisa Bunnage, Parenting Coach

Duration: 1 minute, 39 seconds

Some teenagers have sex at 12, 13, 14 years old, others wait until they're 16, some are 18 and even older.

There's a few factors involved in that, but the number one factor is self-esteem. If you have children that have high self-esteem they're more likely to wait until they're older.

If you find out that your teen is sexually active, you're probably going to freak out initially and that's okay. You can do that, you're allowed, there's very few times you should freak out as a parent, but you're allowed, absolutely.

The first thing you should find out from them is are they on birth control. So don't even deal with the sexual activity first, just say “are you on birth control?”

Make sure that if you have a daughter, she's on the pill. And double up, make sure she uses condoms also because sexually transmitted diseases aren't not prevented by the birth control pill.

The best thing you can do if you have teenagers that are sexually active is talk to them about sex, details, discuss it openly with them, because it's amazing how little they know.

Even if they're sexually active, they don't even know what they're doing, so you really have to educate them on what sex is and how it should be. It should be an emotional thing, not just a physical thing so talk to them, communicate with them.

If you have sexually active teenagers, you should take them to your GP and make sure they're checked over and your GP can talk to them and back you up with birth control because you want to make sure they get on birth control and also try and keep them safe.

So don't ignore it, you have to face up to it. If they're sexually active, just start talking to them about it, don't deny it. Just accept it, and hopefully they will make a better choice down the road.

Presenter: Ms. Lisa Bunnage, Counselor, Coquitlam, BC

Local Practitioners: Counselor